Friday, 7 May 2010

Let's launch The Apostrophe Party

It's time for a bit of decisiveness.
Britain's political system is in turmoil.
First of all, we need cuts. And lots of them.
There are letters all over our language that can easily be dispensed with and replaced by the much more efficient apostrophe.
Furthermore, we need to encourage ownership.
The apostrophe in its possessive form can be used to precede an 's'.
For example, Brown's recession, Freddie's pension and Mandy's boys.
But let's not stop there.
We can form a coalition with the Save the Bastardizing of our Language Party.
No more amounts of MP's, no more less seats and, above all, no more Gordon Brown.
(Okay, that last one was grammatically correct, but it's time he went anyway.)
Let's get rid of the punks and bring back punctuation.

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